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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24650938">Heartworm</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dimensional_ghost/pseuds/dimensional_ghost'>dimensional_ghost</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Given (Anime), Given (Manga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, but i kinda changed the scene, i love yuki, some dialogues from the manga/anime, the dream scene is kinda random but bear w me pls, they go on an ocean date :)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:15:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,098</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24650938</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dimensional_ghost/pseuds/dimensional_ghost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Heartworm: <i>(n.)</i> a relationship or friendship that you can’t get out of your head, which you thought had faded long ago but is still somehow alive and unfinished, like an abandoned campsite whose smoldering embers still have the power to start a forest fire.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Satou Mafuyu/Yoshida Yuuki</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Heartworm</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I really love mafuyu and yuki's relationship (no offense uenoyama) so i had to get this out of my system before watching given again (;﹏;)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“How long ‘till we get there?”</p><p>“God, you’re so impatient...there’s still a few stops before ours. You can go back to sleep. I’ll wake you up when we get there.”</p><p>Mafuyu stares at the floor of the bus as if contemplating whether Yuki’s shoulder is comfortable enough to take another short nap on or not. After a few seconds, he shuffles and rests his head on it and decides that yes, it is indeed a much better resting place instead of the cold glass of the window next to him. Yuki’s scarf is fuzzy and keeps tingling his cheek, but he doesn’t mind.</p><p>“Hm. Okay.”</p><p>He feels Yuki’s warm breath as he rests his own head on top of his. The gentle shaking of the bus mixed with his boyfriend’s quiet humming – <i>he keeps humming that same melody over and over, where did he hear it?</i> - lulls him to sleep.</p><p> </p><p>(Mafuyu dreams of Tama- many Tamas, actually. They’re jumping all around and together they look like a soft, white cloud. He laughs when the many Tamas lift him up and they bring him up, up in the blue sky, and it’s peaceful. Wherever he looks, there’s endless seas of fluffy white clouds. He lies down on the Tamas and, <i>oh there’s a cloud shaped like a dinosaur. </i></p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>Another one that looks just like the donuts I had earlier. </p><p>
  <i>And there’s Yuki- huh?</i>
</p><p>Suddenly, the Yuki cloud starts talking. <i>I didn’t know clouds could talk</i>, he thinks, puzzled.<br/>
For some reason, it keeps telling him to wake up - something about the ocean. He just stares at it and smiles. It really sounds like Yuki.)</p><p> </p><p>“-yu. Mafuyu, wake up or I’m going to leave you here! Why did I let you fall back asleep, you sleep like a rock...”</p><p>Mafuyu’s eyes open slowly and he takes in his surroundings. Oh, right. He’s on the bus with Yuki because he wanted to take him to the ocean, or something like that.</p><p>“Are we there yet?”</p><p>“Oh good, you’re awake-” Yuki scrambles to get up and runs to hold the door- “Wait, we’re getting off!”- he mouths at Mafuyu to get his guitar and <i>come on, we don’t have much time!</i></p><p>Mafuyu takes his time standing up and trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes. When he’s almost at the door, Yuki’s guitar secured in his hand, Yuki takes his free arm and leads him out of the bus.<br/>
They both run (or rather, Yuki runs and Mafuyu lazily follows. He’s never been a fan of physical activity, unlike his boyfriend) to make it to the place Yuki wants to bring him to before it gets crowded- or that’s what he said. Mafuyu is just happy to hold his hand, really.</p><p>After a few minutes of running an exhausted Mafuyu, his hands on his knees as he tries to catch his breath, and a panting Yuki finally make it to the ocean.<br/>
The air is moist and filled with the strong smell of salt and Mafuyu doesn’t really like the way it makes him want to scrunch up his nose so often, but if Yuki wants to bring him here, then he’s okay with salty air and sand that keeps getting in his boots.<br/>
<i>He probably planned something cheesy to do, along with the ocean date. I shouldn’t judge him like that.</i></p><p>After catching some more breaths he looks at Yuki, and-</p><p> </p><p>“Woah, it’s freezing! I’m gonna die!”</p><p> </p><p>
  <i>Well, that was anticlimatic.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>There <i>is</i> a chilly wind so Mafuyu can’t blame him, but the scarf that he somehow managed to remember to bring keeps him warm, so he doesn’t really mind.<br/>
</p>
<p>
(Now that he thinks about it, Yuki has a scarf too. He’s just being dramatic like always.)<br/>
</p><p>He gets some hair out of his eyes and looks at the vast ocean before them. It’s a few minutes before sunset, so the sun is right at that angle where the warm sunlight reflects on the water and makes it glittery. It’s a really pretty sight, and Mafuyu can’t find it in himself to look away. The sound of the waves is calming, and - <i>I just remembered something.</i></p><p>“I think...” Mafuyu starts, staring at the white foam that gets on the sand every time the waves recede, “I think this is the first time I’ve ever come to the ocean.”</p><p>Yuki turns his head at him and makes a weird sound. </p><p>“Augh – I’m sorry I said the ocean was going to kill me - the ocean’s awesome! The best!”</p><p>Mafuyu glances at him deadpanned. “Lying is as easy for you as breathing, huh?”</p><p> </p><p>---</p><p> </p><p>Still holding his hand, Yuki asks his boyfriend to walk with him on the shore.<br/>
They had both decided to take off their shoes and leave them somewhere in sight a bit earlier, so now that they’re barefoot he can feel the cool grains of sand under his feet. It’s refreshing in a way, and the clean air leaves him smiling lazily. They don’t talk for some time, just happy to walk together, until Yuki decides to break off the comfortable silence with a question.</p><p>“You’ve never been to the ocean before? Really?”</p><p>“Mhm. You know I don’t really like water, so I never had a reason to come here by myself.”</p><p>Yuki chuckles quietly.</p><p>“Why are you laughing?”</p><p>“it’s just-” he tightens the hold on Mafuyu’s hand ever so slightly, “So I’m the first person you ever came to the ocean with, huh?”</p><p>Mafuyu contemplates.  “Yeah. Most of my firsts are with you, Yuki.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <i>Most of my firsts are with him.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>He didn’t really think about it before saying it out loud, but he’s right. It’s thanks to this boy next to him that Mafuyu’s where he is now.</p><p> </p><p>He remembers when his dad was taken away by the police, and Yuki’s tiny arms held him tightly as he cried quietly. That was the first time someone told him that he was wanted- that he was <i>loved.</i></p><p>He remembers the first time someone held his hand, Yuki’s umbrella was secured in his other hand but they still got wet, and they were both soaked to the bone by the time they arrived to their middle school. Their teacher made sure to give them a lecture, but when she left they both started laughing like crazy.</p><p>He remembers their first kiss as it was yesterday – golden sunlight filled the empty classroom of the high school they went to, his heart was beating so fast he was sure Yuki could hear it, but when he closed his eyes and felt the other’s lips <i>finally</i> on his own, his entire world stopped at once.</p><p>He remembers the first time they made love. His skin was hot, <i>so</i> hot, and he wanted to cry, but he wasn’t sure if it was because of the nervousness or the way Yuki kept holding him oh so <i>gently</i>, reminding him of how just much he loved him, and <i>it’s okay, Mafuyu. You’re okay. I’m not going anywhere.</i></p><p> </p><p>Mafuyu’s heart starts to beat faster at the reminder of how much the boy next to him is a part of his world and he’s so lost in his own thoughts that he doesn’t notice the other’s tender gaze when Mafuyu’s hand squeezes his.</p><p> </p><p>He gets back to reality when Yuki finds a comfortable spot on the shore, and asks Mafuyu to sit down next to him. The boy quietly follows.<br/>
(Their clothes are going to be filled with sand when they get up, but neither of them really cares.)</p><p>The silence sits comfortably between the two boys who are just enjoying the other’s company, by now so familiar. They’re both an essential part of each other’s world, and Mafuyu doesn’t want to think how lost he would be without Yuki holding his hand as they try to get through life, day after day.</p><p>“Can I tell you something, Mafuyu?” Yuki asks quietly – <i>he’s so different when it’s just us.</i></p><p>Mafuyu nods slowly. He can feel the pit of his stomach getting warm - maybe it’s because he doesn’t know what Yuki is going to say, or maybe because of the way Yuki’s slender fingers are intertwined with his own like two pieces of a whole. </p><p> </p><p>It could be both, actually.</p><p> </p><p>“Listen...I know I promised you the moon and stars-”</p><p>Mafuyu’s laughing interrupts him, “Yuki, you’re such a sap-”</p><p>“Don’t laugh, I was trying to be serious-!”</p><p>Mafuyu notices that Yuki’s whole face is flushed and, okay. Maybe he can hear what he has to say.</p><p>“I know I promised you the moon and stars,” Yuki tries again, and this time Mafuyu doesn’t laugh so he continues, “but for now all that I can give you is this,” he says as he reaches into his school bag and takes out a small bracelet with golden stars. Mafuyu stares at it for a few seconds while Yuki looks at the sand beneath them, uncomfortably. </p><p>“Look, it’s okay if you don’t like it, I can probably return it so-”</p><p>Mafuyu shakes his head, “It’s not that. I really like it. But...”</p><p>“But?”</p><p>“It’s not my birthday. Why would you give it to me?”</p><p>Yuki smiles. “Do I need a reason to want to give a <i>gift</i> to my<i>boyfriend?”</i></p><p>When Mafuyu doesn’t respond, Yuki takes his arm - <i>here, roll up your sleeve a little so that I can put it on</i> – and when it’s on, he takes Mafuyu’s cheeks in his palms and plants a soft kiss on his lips.</p><p>“I gave it to you so that in the future you won’t forget about this day.”</p><p>“Yuki, why would I forget-”</p><p>Yuki shakes his head.</p><p>“You might remember when you come to the ocean again. Or on another cold winter day like this. Or when you randomly start humming that weird song,” <i>-Oh, so he got it from me?</i></p><p>“But you’re probably going to forget.” Yuki’s voice is somber as his eyes bore into Mafuyu’s, searching for the right words to say. His thumbs start forming circles on the boy’s cold cheeks.</p><p>“You’ll remember it next year. Probably even five years from now. But you probably won’t think about it in ten, I bet. So…I got you this bracelet. So you won’t forget, even when I’m gone.”</p><p>“Gone? Yuki, what are you talking about-”</p><p>Yuki interrupts him with another kiss, this time one with so many feelings behind it, as if he didn’t have much time left in this world and had to convey everything he felt for the boy beside him in this one tender kiss.</p><p>“Even when I’m gone, Mafuyu...I’ll be here,” Yuki looks at the bracelet and the way he’s talking makes Mafuyu want to cry. “So don’t worry. You have to keep on living, for me and for yourself.”</p><p>“I don’t understand-”</p><p>“You need to wake up, Mafuyu. Everyone’s waiting for you.”</p><p>“But we just got here-”</p><p>Yuki kisses him again. His hands are cold and Mafuyu can’t help the tears that start spilling from his eyes.</p><p>“This isn’t real, and you know that. They’re all waiting for you to come back.”</p><p>“No, I have so many things to tell you, so many things left to do, I can’t-”</p><p>Yuki hugs the boy close to his chest as his cries turn into sobs, and a gentle <i>“I love you”</i> rolls out of his lips as Mafuyu opens his eyes and realizes that the pillow he’s been hugging is damp with tears.</p><p> </p><p>He sits up on his bed. His tears won’t stop falling. </p><p> </p><p>
  <i>I dreamed about him again.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>He looks at the bracelet. The tiny stars are still golden and shiny, even after all this time and after how many times he had thrown it in fits of rage and self loathing. He wonders what Yuki would say if he were here right now, seeing him like this.</p><p>
  <i>Everyone’s waiting for you.</i>
</p><p>He would probably hug him. Tell him that it’s okay, that he has to move on.</p><p>“How am I supposed to go on if you’re not here…?” He says to no one. He’s cold, and shaking, and for some reason he can’t stop crying even if he wanted to.</p><p>No matter where he goes, Yuki’s always in his head – his messy blonde hair, his hazel eyes, the simple and tender smile he’d show only to Mafuyu and him alone.</p><p>
  <i>You’re in everything I see.</i>
</p><p>He grips the bracelet in a tight hold, squeezing his eyes shut.</p><p> </p><p>
  <i>Even though I couldn’t say goodbye...You’ll always be here with me.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>“I miss you...Yuki.”</p>
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